It has taken me almost two years and a lot of pressure from my friends (- especially you, Drigz!) to update my journal. This time I will only talk about two of the biggest events that have happened in the last two years: firstly - I became a father, and secondly I participated in an exhibition in a major metropolitan museum in the city of Vienna. Both events happened rather simultaneously. I was invited to participate in the "EXODUS - tod alltäglich." exhibition at the Künstlerhaus by the Mexican embassy in Vienna. The important little detail to know was that I was asked to paint as many pieces as I possibly could within a period of only two weeks. Naturally I accepted this invitation, but as anyone can see it is a bit insane to try to get museum quality artwork done in only two weeks. Yet I really could not refuse the opportunity to have my work displayed in a museum, so I set to work right away. I gathered some of my original sketches along with some illustrations from the famous Mexican artist Posada. The original idea was to create 12 medium size pieces, but due to the lack of time I decided on 5 mural size ones.


I have to mention that all this crazy art production was happening during the last two weeks of my wife's pregnancy, so while I had the pressure to make the best artwork I could, I also had to deal with the simple, little fact I would be a father very soon!!! Obviously I was very nervous about both events, so I really had to make a huge effort to concentrate on the paintings, as well as to be able to be with my wife during this very important stage in our lives. The art production was only possible because I worked 10 hours at a time with only 3 hours of sleep in between. During this time my wife had been really supportive, so that I was able to be more productive.

As I was working on the pieces, I had a lot of time to think about becoming a father. My mind was full of big questions: would I be a good father? What makes a good father? What can I do to become a better person? Do I have what it takes to be a good father? These were only those that really stand out in my mind now, but as you can imagine there were hundreds of questions popping up in my brain like bubbles in boiling water. I was very glad that I had the opportunity to concentrate on my art, as I was able to really think, and come to terms with the fact that my life would be changed forever. Never in my life have I been confronted with a bigger reality than this one, and all of the sudden I began to be aware of all my personal shortcomings. At the beginning this was really hard on me, it's not easy to figure that you are not what you want to be, but in the end this realization has turned into something very positive: I came to terms with who I am, and the person I want to be - first of all for myself, and more importantly for my little one who was soon to arrive.

In the end I was able to finish all 5 pieces within the deadline, and the director of the Mexican Cultural Center was thrilled to see the outcome. For this particular exhibition there were two openings: one was the official opening of the entire exhibition, and the second one was the official Mexican opening. The reason for having two openings was that the exhibition was about "Death", and as most people know, Mexico has a very peculiar way of "celebrating" instead of mourning our dead, and the exhibition coincided with the traditional "Dia de los Muertos". My wife was in the very last stages of her pregnancy when we attended the first opening. We had a great response from the public: the opening brought more than 400 people at once. What really made things even better for me was the fact that our hall was the first one in a series of rooms filled with work of other artists, so everyone had the chance to see my work before any other piece. Since most people responded so well to the our exhibition, I was asked to make yet another piece for the Mexican opening. Of course I could not refuse a direct request from the Mexican ambassador himself, so one more time I ended up working my ass off. The only difference this time was that my wife was now REALLY about to give birth to my child. Imagine me now: tired, excited, overjoyed, scared, happy, going insane, etc., etc.


In the end I was able to finish this last one piece, and it turned to be the best of all 6 I managed to make. The day on which I finished the last piece my wife began having her first contractions. AHHHHHHH!!!!! Now our little one was really and truly entering the home stretch! During the day my wife kept on calling me to let me know how was she doing. That day I made it home around 2 in the morning - and she was already having regular contractions. We knew it was just a matter of hours before the birth, so I took a shower and we decided to get to bed and rest a little bit before things would become really crazy. Well, our little one decided that Daddy was not going to get one minute of sleep that night: 5 minutes after we laid down in bed, my wife's water broke and I really started to get nervous. We called the ambulance, and at about 3:00 AM we were on our way to the hospital. Long and frustrating hours came next... I have never felt more inadequate and helpless in my life. My wife was going through labor, and there was nothing I could do but be a spectator. Labor was long, so I managed to get a couple of hours of sleep. At 12:25 my gorgeous little Elena was born, I witnessed her first breath... nothing can really describe my feelings when I finally got to meet my child. It was truly love at first sight. My life was changed there and then, I finally had my so very anticipated little one in my arms. I was so overjoyed to become a father of a beautiful baby girl!

Yet more work for the exhibition still had to be done, so for the next three days I had lots to do - but I did go to visit my girls in the hospital. I'm sorry to say that I didn't spend as much time as I should have had, and that I regret. On the fourth day after her birth I picked up my girls from the hospital and took them home. Coincidentally, this special day was the Mexican opening of the exhibition, so the girls could be there along with me. Elena participated in her Dad's first major exhibition at only four days old!!!

My life has changed so dramatically: I am a proud father now, I have rediscovered my artistic side, I'm a husband to a gorgeous wife, and I have found the energy and stimulation to improve to be the person I want to be.


Dear friends, I thank you for allowing me to share a bit of my life with you.

Yours truly,

Victor